A bad rhyme
by minko
Summary: the title says it all...based on Twas the night before Christmas not a X-mas fic rated pg13 for language update nothing to do with ch.1
1. Default Chapter

Ok, I was searching through my files of old reports (since it's the end of the school year for me ^_^) and I found this. I think I was drunk when I wrote it... Well any ways I haven't posted any thing in a while, so I decided to post this (in other words im trying to find reasons not to do my homework..) I also found a Christmas story but it's the wrong time of year and its not finished (not like this one is) so Enjoy! *mumble* or at least try..  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own nothing (see, I don't even own good English)  
  
~..~ Is the poem parts  
  
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~ Twas the night before the mission and all through the house  
  
The assassins were stirring as softly as a mouse~  
  
Weib: *stir softly*  
  
Schwarz: o_O  
  
~The weapons were assorted with great love and care  
  
In hopes that Manx would soon be there~  
  
Yoji: Why would Manx come in the middle of the night?  
  
Farfie: Heh heh, visitors in the middle of the night hurt god.  
  
~Omi was nestled all snug in his bed  
  
While visions of women danced in yoji's head~  
  
Schu: How... touching  
  
~And Aya with his kantana and Ken with his ball  
  
Everybody was ready, to see Schwarz fall~  
  
Yoji: He he.  
  
Ken: A soccer ball, she meant a soccer ball you baka!  
  
Crawford: Wait to see SCHWARZ fall?!?!!?  
  
~Then down in the shop, there was a small clatter  
  
So they all jumped out of bed, to see what could be the matter~  
  
Weib: *jump*  
  
Farfie: Clatters hurt god  
  
~Down stares Aya flew like a flash  
  
While Ken peered out the window and Omi sat up in a dash~  
  
Aya: *falls down stares*  
  
Ken: *runs into window*  
  
Omi: *attempts to sit up but hits his head on the bed frame instead*  
  
Nagi: Heh.  
  
~Yoji stumbled out into the new fallen snow  
  
Ken threw some pants, to the older man below~  
  
Yoji: Wait, how did I get outside, and why don't I have any pants on?!? *pants hit him in the face* Oh. thanks Ken.  
  
~But much to there dismay, no one was there  
  
So they all went back to sleep, without much care~  
  
Aya: Wait, why would it be to our dismay?  
  
Yoji, Ken, and Omi: *shrug* *go back to sleep*  
  
~But as Omi fell slowly asleep  
  
He thought he heard a tiny peep~  
  
Tiny peep: peep Omi: o_O  
  
~Now he wondered what this peep could be  
  
It couldn't be much more important than he~  
  
Omi: ;.; that's not very nice.  
  
~So he decided to go investigate this sound  
  
He would have to make a trip around~  
  
Nagi: *yawn* Why must we be here?  
  
~With three darts in one hand  
  
He could sneak around the corners, is what he planned.~  
  
Crawford: Was that really your plan?  
  
Schu: That was a pretty crappy plan.  
  
Farfie: Crappy plans hurt-  
  
Crawford: Don't say it!  
  
~But what he saw, was not a great surprise  
  
It was just a few simple flies~  
  
Omi: _ ( (has a fly in his eye)  
  
Crawford: And she was doing so well up until this point, what a shame..  
  
~He watched these flies for quite some time  
  
And im having a hard time with this rhyme~ - Where I lost it  
  
All:.  
  
Author: ...sorry....  
  
Crawford: Cant think of anything else?  
  
Author:.................. No  
  
Schuldig: Wow your head is completely empty.  
  
Author: You shut up! You guys can finish this story, im gonna go do homework *leaves*  
  
All: -_-  
  
Farfie: Then all of a sudden he cared, because he saw a bear  
  
Ken: A bear in a apartment? What are you seeing impaired?!?!  
  
Farfie: Um, yes you geek  
  
Ken: At least I'm not a freak  
  
Nagi: Your just wasting time.  
  
Omi: Um.. I like to eat limes  
  
Schuldig: You like to eat limes?  
  
Yoji: Your not very good at rhymes.  
  
Aya: Your all losers  
  
Yoji: Well.. At least were not.. Hoosers!  
  
Nagi: What the hell is a hooser?  
  
Yoji: It's a cross between a hoser and a boozer  
  
Nagi: Um. ok.  
  
Aya: I think were done..................  
  
All: *glare at Crawford*  
  
Crawford: *sigh* we all had so much fun *cough* not *cough*  
  
All:..........................  
  
Farfie: Bad rhymes hurt god!  
  
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O_o Wow, not much of a conclusion... Well.. Please review? 


	2. another lame schwarz humor story

My friend came up with this when we were in 8th grade and I wrote it. Were in 10th grade now, and I just found it while I was looking for extra paper I could finish my math on (and I'm still not done with it, stupid distractions) Anyways, I decided to post it, even if it's just so my friend could read it. Do you remember this Schwarzryuu?

Disclaimer: I don't own them but if I did own an anime character I would want it to be Marron from sorcerer hunters, he's a cutie

* * *

Farfarello laid sprawled out on the living room floor playing with his blender and watching good quality programs that hurt God. Now, most people wouldn't know, but it's hard to hurt god on Mondays. Especially when no one's around. At least when Brad was around he could hurt him, which was like hurting god, since Brad seemed to think he was god. Nagi had locked himself in his room, Schuldig was still sleeping (which hurt god because it was like 2:00 in the afternoon), and Brad had gone to a Business meeting. If he dident hurt god soon he was going to have to do something drastic. Last time this resulted in Farfie running through the house with Schuldig's coat on backwards yelling cross dressing hurts god.

Just then the doorbell rang. Farfie looked around for a second then got up to answer the door. Two very happy looking people greeted him.

"Hello their sir, we are two missionary's from the church of Jesus Christ, and we want to teach YOU about god"

Farfarello stood there for a second blinking, debating over weather to give them a quick death and get these retched god loving humans of this planet as soon as possible or extend their torturing time and make them suffer.

* * *

Schuldig woke up to the distinct feeling that something was wrong. He could feel two unfamiliar minds among the quiet house. That was the second problem... their house was never quiet when Farfarello was around. He quickly got out of bed and ran down stairs where he could feel Farfarello's presence. Evidently Nagi had sensed something was wrong too since he was standing in front of the door staring. The scene before Schuldig surprised him. There was two people dressed in church uniforms holding bibles while leading a willing Farfarello out the door.

"Uh, what's going on?" The red head asked

"Don't worry Schu, I WANT to go." Farf gave him a deranged but happy smile. Schuldig hesitated for a second, then smiled.

"Ok, whatever you say...."

"We'll have him back in an hour." One of the bible thumpers spoke out.

"Oh no you wont..."

"What?"

"Nothing, have fun!"

* * *

One hour later Farfarello came back home with a blood stained vest and pants. Brad raised an eyebrow.

"And where were you?"

"Hurting god."


End file.
